My inner thoughts

20th June 2025 - 17:59: I wouldn't wish this feeling on my worst enemy. It's eating my fucking brain alive. I don't feel like getting into the nitty gritty I guess because each day I slowly get better but I miss him. Its so painful not being able to stalk his every move on socials and his every thought. Every day I get better. It will get better. That evil motherfucker and his grip on my brain. I literally carved his initial into my leg. Stupid fucking bitch now he's there forever. It will get better.

Moving on, I try to become friends with men and the same thing happens. They make me uncomfortable because of how quickly the conversation turns sexual. Im not completely innocent because I was entertaining this one guy because he was giving me nice compliments (god knows Im an attention whore). But sending me a video of him cumming on a picture of my face was not warranted. I literally feel like ive been violated. It almost made me cry but thankfully my meds won't allow me to do that I guess. I just want to be friends with a cool guy with similar interests like why is that impossible. I also got sent this guys boner but like I met him on a dating site so I guess I set myself up for that one. Only one guy left that isn't actually a complete freak and I can see myself being friends with him. He is a weirdo like me in a good way.

I guess I will update on how that goes. Bye for now.